Priorities

 

Day 17 really taught the Hoffman family some doses of reality about priorities.  Here in this image for the day, Sir Teddy had a tough decision whether to stay with one of his favorite humans - Uncle Tev - or to head of to bed with his good buddy.  Eventually his priority shifted to his good buddy - especially after his good buddy had to work his tail off all evening on school work.  This dog really knows when the kids need him and he checks in on them.  If I had the time and energy to train him, I feel certain he would be a phenomenal comfort service animal because he does it for us every day.  

I remember the feelings of finals week.  It is the week that answers the question - did I give my best in this class this semester?  Most of the time, I had and the finals weren't terribly stressful because their overall effect on my grade was minimal.  I had made sure to get as many points as possible on every assignment, test, and project.  This made finals week easier - because in that effort to get all those points, I had also learned.  So not only did the final have less impact on my grade, it was also easier to prepare because I knew the content from the work I already put in.  Then there were the classes where I didn't do that.  My most painful memory was high school physics.  I had it at the end of the day, so I missed it a lot for Forensics tournaments.  It didn't come easily to me and so I relied heavily on friends to help me catch up and understand.  When finals week came, I realized how little that supported homework time did to help me master the content.  Suddenly, I was wishing to have those weeks back to have those homework assignments to do over again so that I could learn the content in small bits instead of trying to master a whole course in the matter of a few days - when I had other courses competing for my attention.  Wishing for time back that had already been spent on the wrong priorities.  Realizing too late that my priorities had been out of whack.  I don't remember what grade I got in Physics by the skin of my teeth but the stress endured that week stayed with me.   What I know is, I could have done better and regret is such a great teacher.   Watching my kids prepare for their final finals week day, made me remember all those lessons in priorities.  Those struggles are part of how life taught me to keep my priorities straight every day. To do the things you may not want to do over the the things you would much rather be doing.  Easier said than done - that is for sure.  

Lil b and Daddy worked on the last spelling test of 2020.  Lil b has always responded so well to his Daddy and seems to tolerate spelling practice better from him than mom.  It is the opposite for Big B and E so this is a welcome change for me. Feels good to be able to say something that is coming to an end for 2020 as it signals the end of 2020.  This family is ready to see 2020 in the rear view mirror and we hope that 2021 doesn't make us miss 2020.   2020 in review does bring into focus the priorities that really matter most.  When so much is stripped away, you quickly learn what is essential and what can be put on hold.  I am learning how to place God first and my family firmly in second place.  So often work comes first and 2020 taught us that while hard work and effort is important - business is just that, business.  And at the end of your days, you won't be wishing you worked harder or spent more time at the office for a company that may or may not know your name.  Much like my physics lesson, prioritize work so that the work gets done in bits and so it doesn't become the scramble that pushes everything else out of the way.  Give work the priority it needs so that it can give way to those things that rise above it.  

Here is E finding herself lucky that her Uncle Tev is willing to suspend his priorities and place her above them all.  He relearns math that he has long since forgotten to attempt to be an aid in her preparation for her finals.  This was taken shortly before I went to get ready for bed.  As I sit here and type, they are still at it and it is getting late.  While I hope E learns the math and does well on her final, I hope more that she learns what it means to drop your plans to help someone in need.  I hope it teaches her the priority of doing your best so that your call for others is only when you truly need it.  I hope it builds some selflessness in her as she is being shown what that looks like when she is the benefactor.  Most of all, I hope it reminds her that though friendships are currently priority number one for her - she has a family that has been prioritizing her for her entire life.  Modeling for her that family is forever and is constantly looking out for her.  These are the things that teens are often blind to (and for some rebelling against) but as life humbles them and teaches them lessons - their eyes are opened to those whom have been there all along.  

In totally unrelated news - Teddy brought us a gift this morning that Brandon discovered. . . .ugh.  Really realigned my priorities to focusing on having a rodent free home.  

Fortunately - this friend wasn't alive.  Phew!   It was a mousicle brought in from outside.  But now I am all heebie geebied out that there may be more of his kind somewhere close by......ick!   

Ending today really evaluating my own priorities, my areas where my eyes need to be opened, how to provided mentorship and boundaries to help my kiddos with their priorities, and where are the things that can just get let go.   It can be a painful process to let go of things that we wish were priorities but we know that in the long run, the right priorities bring less stress and more happiness.  Wish us luck as we walk through this process.